Doing the Impossible: Star Wars, a Disney Story
Written by Pat Neistat.
Bob Iger has unofficially decided that his legacy will be cemented at Disney Parks here in the States by utilizing Star Wars to change how we experience theme parks forever. First, Iger negotiated the purchase of Lucasfilms in 2012 for a cool $4.05 billion. Anyone with a brain knows that he stole that shit from George Lucas. Then he personally announced his baby at the D23Expo in 2015- two identical 14 acre Star Wars themed lands. One would be placed in Disneyland and the other in Walt Disney World. It will be the biggest Land the company has ever done in their theme parks. He blew up the damn internet with this announcement and the concept artwork that came with it. He’s giving guests the opportunity to fly the Millennium Falcon, and find themselves in the middle of a fight between the First Order and the Resistance. This shit is going to be 100% immersive. Scott Trowbridge has been placed in charge of the Imagineering on this. Iger has challenged Trowbridge to push the damn envelope and build something badass. Construction on this land started in 2016. Fast forward to the D23Expo in 2017 and we were given a glimpse of how creative Trowbridge really is. At that time Disney unveiled the long awaited ‘not so mini’ model of the Star Wars Land and jaws spontaneously hit the damn ground with a collective “holy shit.” Yeah, it kicked ass. Unfortunately for Disney, the internet is still undefeated and the name leaked hours before the official announcement, Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge.
Every Star Wars nerd is right now fantasizing about dressing up in their favorite costume and running amok in the Park. Let’s be clear, Robert Allen Iger isn’t going to let you wear your broke-ass costumes and ruin it for everyone else. *Editor’s Note: This is true in all Disney Parks as they don’t want guest to confuse other travelers for cast members. Also, your costume probably ain’t that cool. However, Mr. Iger will let you be a full on dork somewhere else on property. Disney announced there will be a Star Wars themed luxury resort exclusive to Walt Disney World. We have minimal information on this announcement. Bob Chapek, Chairman of Walt Disney Parks and Resorts said “From the second you arrive, you will become a part of a Star Wars story! You’ll immediately become a citizen of the galaxy and experience all that entails, including dressing up in the proper attire. Once you leave Earth, you will discover a starship alive with characters, stories, and adventures that unfold all around you. It is 100% immersive, and the story will touch every single minute of your day, and it will culminate in a unique journey for every person who visits.” Each room will have a view of space. Understandably, Star Wars fans are going apeshit over this announcement. I have to say it does sound unbelievable. Our speculation at Not_Club 33 is that this will be a 2-3 day stay with unique transportation to Galaxy’s Edge, essentially allowing you to feel like you’re in a movie. It will be all inclusive and come with a hefty price tag starting around $1,000 per night offering different types of experiences. You know people will be lining up to hand over the money to have this unimaginable experience. *Editor’s Note: there’s probably a fucking queue forming right now